House of Eratosthenes

Regular readers of this blog, which nobody actually reads, know that we here like to keep an eye on issues involving women in skimpy outfits — because this blog is written by a red-blooded normal man, and that’s what red-blooded normal men do. Actually, there are other reasons to oggle these issues, some of them not quite so pleasant. It has to do with people of both sexes being…funny.

We live in a time where nearly all of us become aware something is happening, more or less at the same time. We can achieve unity with each other supporting some things, and opposing other things. I’ve noticed after watching people for a long period of time, that there really aren’t too many things that can be opposed with widespread unity, quite so much as things involving young girls in skimpy outfits. And when large numbers of people oppose something with unity, and you ask them why they oppose it, in terms of incoherent, babbling, nonsensical answers you get back, the things involving young girls in skimpy outfits really take the cake.

It objectifies women. Actually, unless a girl is being somehow physically forced to wear something skimpy that she doesn’t want to wear, nobody’s objectifying anybody.

It exploits women. Same as above. If free will is involved, whatever’s being “done to” the young lady is something she’s doing to herself.

It’s inappropriate for the young children who may end up seeing it. Funny, this is reserved for the appropriate things like G-rated sports bars, and issues of Sports Illustrated. Very seldom does anyone use this to slam something that children really should not be seeing, like Playboy, or Hustler, or Penthouse, or adult nightclubs, or “juice bars.”

It reinforces the message to men and young boys, that women are nothing more than sexual objects to be used. Speaking as a man who’s had to make his share of decisions about whether a woman is a sexual object to be used, I can tell you that some “message” is the very last piece of reference material I call on in making that decision. Oh, unless you’re talking about “messages” from the lady herself.

Young girls are taught that their worth depends on the sum of their body parts. Aw geez, what a quivering, neurotic blob of gelatinous goo I would be by now, if I listened to other people tell me what my worth depended on. Are young girls really that insecure? They do a lot more talking and chattering than little boys the same age. It doesn’t look like insecurity to me. What young girls are you talking about?

Anyway, you get my point. These answers are easily slapped-down, but they’re something else. They’re monotonous. They lack the passion that answers have when they are dished out by people who actually believe in them. It’s weird. It’s like some telepathic orbiting Mother-Ship has taken control of these people’s brains, and they’re protesting something, only pretending to intrinsically understand the reason why they’re protesting.

People are seldom more confused, nonsensical, indecipherable, and generally wombat-rabies bollywonkers crazy, than when they band together to oppose something that has to do with cute girls showing their thighs, breasts, bellies and butt cheeks. Very few other calls-to-arms are so well-established in creating so much heat and motion, and making so little sense. And very few other issues will unite them so closely. I’m a little bit scared by that.

This blog takes a special interest in things lots and lots of people do, that make very little sense. So we keep an eye on this…especially when the enterprises involving young ladies in skimpy clothing, are entirely G-rated. Which means we follow Hooters very, very carefully.

Last May, I had a lot of interest in the fact that Hooter’s Air was expanding coverage to cities in Pennsylvania and South Carolina. I’ve never been to South Carolina and very seldom go to Pennsylvania. But it was notable because the airline industry as a whole was in full-scale retreat, and here was Hooter’s expanding.

Well, it seems that was a case of beginner’s luck. Lehigh Valley International Airport is being pulled off the routes; looks like Myrtle Beach remains for now. At this point, the airline industry is still in a little bit of a depression, so you could chalk it up to that. Hooter’s Air, for both the old routes and the newer ones, appears to have triumphed over the frumpy soccer moms waving picket signs, who live in daily terror that their husbands might get an eyeful of something younger and like what they see. This latest shrinkage seems to be a case of response to supply and demand.

I really don’t go to Hooter’s that often. But I’m convinced beyond the shadow of any doubt, that most of the people who protest when Hooter’s thinks about moving in across the street, have never gone to one. I’m the first to get nervous when I learn I’ll be living next to a sleazy old bar…or a Karate studio (which I do)…or a check cashing business…or a liquor store with bars in the windows.

But Hooters? If I was thinking about buying a house and Hooters signs started popping up at a business a block away, I’d pay extra. Some people think the food could use some better quality control. But I’ve been to a lot of different restaurants, and I’ve never had bad service, not once.

Oh, how many businesses do I wish I could say that about. Really.

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Win Some, Lose SomeFriday, March 17th, 2006

Win Some, Lose Some
Friday, March 17th, 2006