House of Eratosthenes

A recent Pew Research report that shows the continued decline of marriage rates has opened a debate about the decline in men who are worthy of marrying. Why are men increasingly undesirable? Experts point to a high unemployment rate among men, lower college enrollment, and an increase in the number of adult males living at home with their parents (20 percent of men ages 25-31 live at home, while just 12% of women do).

However, it’s also possible this is the result of the growing number of men basking in a prolonged state of adolescent immaturity? Could it be that people are simply not interested in cohabitating with men do little more than drink with their buddies, play video games, and watch porn? If this is the case, where are these types of guys most plentiful and where are they least common? Estately set out to determine which states have a higher percentage of adult males still sleeping between their childhood Star Wars sheets by using these (typically male) immaturity measurements…

1. No Job (unemployment rate for each state)
2. Fantasy Football Enthusiasm (expressed interest for fantasy football by male Facebook users ages 25-65 in each state)
3. Beer Pong Enthusiasm (expressed interest for beer pong by male Facebook users ages 25-65 in each state)
4. Video Game Enthusiasm (expressed interest for video games by male Facebook users ages 25-65 in each state)
5. Enthusiasm for watching The Family Guy (expressed interest for The Family Guy by male Facebook users ages 25-65 in each state)
6. Porn Viewership (number of porn downloads per capita in each state)

In the end we discovered the country’s most immature men are congregated in the Midwest, Great Lakes, Southwest, and Appalachia. The most mature were in the Northwest, Mountain West, and South.

Well, I’m flattered (Washington State: #48) but, at the same time, skeptical (California: #40; New York: #35; Ohio: #5). All states watch more porn than California? The questions that are asked, don’t seem useful to me. And I notice the states that achieved a certain spectacular spectrum-endpoint position in response to one question, generally, seem to have achieved a similar position in response to all the others. I think they managed to put together some meticulous and reliable research showing which states are inhabited by males who are good at lying to pollsters.

There is, of course, yet another way to read it. From the comments:

These men aren’t immature, they are simply responding to incentives, like any rational human does. And there is little incentive to get married to high-confidence, high-maintenance, high-weight, high-price, low-femininity, “empowered” American woman.

And…

Looks like a good map for finding states with sane family courts.

Just look at the bottom of the list.

And…

Part of it is women becoming overwhelmingly unattractive. Where are the feminine, classy women? Nowhere to be seen. Where are the slutty, brassy women? Puking in the gutters every Thursday through Saturday night.

I agree that had the survey actually achieved what it was trying to do, we might be able to draw those complementary assumptions. To say that that is what happened here, though, is to say that California must have sane family courts. I haven’t heard anyone who’s been through those courts, say any such thing, except for some militant-feminists maybe. But somehow I don’t think that’s what the commenter had in mind.

Looks like a first-cut prototype of something that might prove to be useful, if it’s allowed to evolve throughout some more stages. The “Beer Pong” question, I think, is just dumb. Not sure I even know what that is. And, I know of quite a few hard-working, responsibilities-embracing manly-men who enjoy Family Guy. Not here, of course. But that’s because we worked our way through all the episodes on Netflix.

I think the next cut, what they need to do is ask questions about the characteristics of men and women; then, plot the response, or some mathematically-achieved numeric score representing them, on a scatter diagram. This would verify that some correlation has been defined between how women behave, and how men behave. It would be an indicator that the right questions are being asked.

The puking in gutters Thursday through Saturday night: That should stay in. Also, ask the ladies about their role models. Why not? It would provide clear, crisp definition, and it wouldn’t even be hard. We seem to be living in a time in which people can’t wait to talk about this stuff. Taylor Swift? Paris Hilton? Michelle O or Hillary? Lindsay Lohan?

Sensible Dress on Zooey Fashion. Here’s a pic of Zooey Deschanel wearing something very sensible. Could the lady taking the survey see herself in the same item? Or would she rather go for the standby of no-makeup, hair-in-a-bun, ratty tee shirt, and workout pants that haven’t seen a workout. Or maybe something that nice, but with a hefty serving of slut-culture thrown in? With some male sucker paying for it, as long as the price-tag is really high? With twelve-inch spiked fuck-me heels to make Paris Hilton proud?

Females, I perceive, are currently divided on such questions; and, I further perceive, the fellas are modifying their behavior to match the mods in the female behavior.

Questions for the guys: Ask not quite so much about clothes, ask more about abilities. The survey, after all, is supposed to be about male maturity, and male wherewithal. Can you change oil. Tie knots. Build furniture. Cut grass. Drive a moving van. Rent a moving van. Build a suite of software regression tests. And, how do you react if your girlfriend said you remind her of the famous actor, [blank]. John Wayne. Clark Gable. Leonardo DiCaprio. Gary Cooper. Hugh Grant. Clint Eastwood. Tyrone Power. Russell Brand. Errol Flynn.

Justin Bieber.

Hypothesis: The questions are going to be very important in determining the answers; even a slight modification in the former will result in an exponentially pronounced change in the latter. It may therefore seem like a contaminating and therefore unscientific exercise to meddle with these questions, especially when the changes are based on the answers in the previous go-round. But, as I hypothesize some more, eventually you would make a discovery — eventually you would discover a break, a fissure, a diagonal line on the scatter diagram, that is cleaner and more pronounced than randomness would offer.

I think you’d find such a break originating in the female half, and propagating, by way of the males’ desire to earn female approval, to the male half. You’d discover there are some capable ladies, not adequately represented by the cultural buzz because they do not often participate in it, who simply take care of things themselves if they can’t find a man to do it. But, being capable ladies, they eventually do find a man who can do stuff. Then, you have the incapables, the gutter-pukes. They think the way to get anything done, all begins with “Step 1. Find a man who will do it.” They provide the commercial impetus behind sick teevee spots like this one:

They also provide all the complaining and caterwauling that inspired the survey in the first place: They cannot find a man who is able, and willing, to do these things for them. Being incapable, they do not adapt to the situation, they keep doing what they did before: Wear ratty tee shirts and unused workout pants all week, then come Thursday-Friday-Saturday put on something slutty with twelve-inch fuck-me spike shoes, get drunk, and puke in gutters. The results don’t improve, so they do a lot of bitching while the stuff they want done doesn’t get done.

Then, someone eventually listens and takes a survey.

Plot it on a scatter diagram with how sane or insane the family courts are. I’d be interested to see those results. But, not entirely undecided on what they would be.

Update: This just seems to fit in with the rest of it, rather well. Yay, Tony S.

These men aren’t immature, they are simply responding to incentives, like any rational human does. And there is little incentive to get married to high-confidence, high-maintenance, high-weight, high-price, low-femininity, “empowered” American woman.

Why serve a woman like this after she’s slept with 20+ men, ignored you for ten years, and finally wants to “settle down” with a decent man, who owns his own home, cars, and has made a pile of money? All you get is a heartache and the risk that she’ll blow up the marriage, taking half (or more) of your stuff? Nah, not for me. I’ll continue to serve Jesus Christ and contribute to His cause.
- Frank the Wanderer | 10/13/2014 @ 08:07
[…] there’s a new gauge in town, and I like it a tad […]
- Musings from Brian J. Noggle » Blog Archive » Better than the Heinlein | 10/13/2014 @ 12:09
You’re right, of course. These toxic ditzy broads, and the male columnists who write for them, have a definition of “maturity” in mind; something to do with forsaking “beer pong” for romcom movies starring Hugh Grant and Meryl Streep, or something. The specimens are certainly out there, but the problem is if you produce one of them and allow an observer possessing common sense to evaluate the specimen, we say: That’s not maturity. That’s being a rodent-face hipster douche bag.

But it isn’t an incentive thing, either. You don’t necessarily have incentive to serve Jesus Christ; what you have is consciousness of something bigger and more important than your own immediate gratification. See, that is the real issue. The feminists, like JC, are looking to people to put aside their own immediate gratification. They’re competing with the Lord and Savior, that’s part of why they’re hostile to Christianity. Unlike the Real Thing, however, they’re demanding not only rejection of mammon, but of anything that would make the individual strong. Then, they’ll go even further, demanding that all men embrace weakness, and death, diminishing themselves without limit. They’ll never stop tilting the balance of power between men and women, until the man is like the cow-waitress from Restaurant At The End Of The Universe, wandering table to table collecting orders from the dinner patrons on how well they’d like their briskets cooked.

To do that, they have to get the lads young. Teach them to embrace weakness and death, at such a young age that the subjects have yet to grasp such infantile concepts as “Duh, hey, that hurts me…I think I don’t want to be around it.” At first blush it doesn’t seem like a plan that would have much chance at success. But, they’ve been fooling idiotic young bachelors like me, back in the day, and for a good long time too. They’ve been succeeding wildly, almost admirably. It turns out that self-preservation, while being a base instinct, is also something that can be diminished, eventually eliminated altogether. It isn’t even that hard. A little bit of guilt goes a long way.
- mkfreeberg | 10/14/2014 @ 17:31

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States With Immature MenSaturday, October 11th, 2014

States With Immature Men
Saturday, October 11th, 2014