House of Eratosthenes

This house has been good to us. It has become a sad staple of Americana, the story of two starry-eyed spouses falling in love with a “fixer upper” and making the leap, imagining themselves in a charming, quaint, occasionally madcap lifestyle of mending a toilet seat here, replacing a busted doorknob there…and then, in the ensuing frustrations, discovering themselves neck-deep in a nightmare that comes right up to or crosses the line of divorce. We went in on this with a bit of healthy paranoia, hoping for the best and preparing for the worst at each turn. Did some homework. As a happy consequence, we’ve held our head above water. We haven’t had any floors cave in under our feet or anything like that.

We have been very fortunate. I can’t attribute much of this to anything formulaic, that I could pass on to the next couple in terms of advice; except, we have prospered from buying maybe half as much house as we could’ve afforded. That might be some of it. The rest of it is luck. Well…knock on wood, as they say! At least I can knock wherever I want, with confidence. My fist won’t go flying through anything. But now comes the big deal: The fence.

We have a neighbor who seems to be a responsible and up-front fellow, and the layout determines that he & we are going to have to go in 50/50 on this. That is true of the “good neighbor” section that divides our lots from one another, as well as the exterior portion that is the far more serious matter. This is the full-height arrangement, over six feet, fully opaque, a piece of security equipment first. The street on the other side is a bit rough. This is not an aesthetic ornament by any means. What’s there now has been there since the neighborhood went in, twenty years ago, and it wasn’t built or treated properly. We went in half-n-half with the neighbor already, on a patch job to hold it together until “someday,” after the winter winds blew down a fifteen-foot section. Well, someday is coming up pretty quick, and the time’s come to do it right. It’s looking like, from the blanched expression on my neighbor’s face when we got back some quotes, “who pays for the fence” may become an item of pressing concern in the months ahead.

Or, “who fronts the cash.”

And this brings me to my point: I don’t give a flying fuck. As a responsible homeowner, my first & foremost concern is to get the damn thing built. If we have to front the costs, then that’s what it takes. If we have to handle more than our share when it’s all said & done — which I doubt, I think we’re talking about a man of good character — then, that is what we are going to have to do, and we’ll do it without a moment of additional hesitation and we’ll do it cheerfully. We will do it, knowing that the money we’re spending is equivalent to but a tiny portion of the worth of what the fence is protecting. We place importance on that.

Which brings me to Trump’s visit to Mexico…and the news, mostly on the teevee, about it.

For whose benefit are these stories being produced and aired? Not mine. Not any responsible homeowner, who looks on his duties as an American citizen the same way he looks on his duties as resident of the home. All I’m seeing is implications of Trump’s backpedaling, on the question of who pays for the wall. Nothing about the five positions from Trump’s speech, which is the real story, the real platform of fact from which one would need to make a decision, if one were still in the process of deciding. Or maybe that’s the problem, nobody is left still undecided about whether to support or oppose Trump? Is that it? Then why are we having polls, still?

My fence is going to be the most expensive home repair we’ve done, since we moved into the place. It will also be exquisitely aggravating, since we’ve been enjoying a year of seeing the debts associated with buying it two years ago, finally, and quickly, subsiding…dropping, lawn-dart like, not all the way to zero but headed in that direction. The fence we’ve got planned would reverse a lot of that progress. Or rather, will. The project is coming, the money is as good as spent already. I really couldn’t give two shits about whether our neighbor will pay fifty percent, or twenty-five, or zero. It isn’t on my radar.

With regard to America’s fence, people are getting hurt and killed. It has become de riguer for our governments, at all levels, to respond to the crisis by plying us with a bunch of misleading statistics about the illegal aliens’ propensity to commit crime versus equivalent statistics for the native population — as if that mattered even a tiny bit. Rather than fulfilling their obligation to defend the homeland from invasion, and solving the problem.

Opposition to illegal immigration is not opposition to all immigration. There’s nothing racist about it; what color is “don’t trespass”?

A fence is no more bigoted or xenophobic, than a front door on your house that locks.

And “who pays for the wall” is a peripheral concern at best. That question is nothing more than campaign rhetoric. Put out by those who are running the campaign of don’t-do-anything.

[…] House of Eratosthenes […]
- We have replaced religion | THE ONE, THE ONLY, IOWADAWG BLOG! | 09/01/2016 @ 12:14
In my foolish years of youth (QUIET you in the back)
there was a common economic arrangement where one interested party would provided capital, and the other would produce the necessary labor/ and possibly shipping liabilities, for the mutual benefit of “common” advantage.
“You buy, I’ll fly” to actually unass ones chair to go up to the bar, or perhaps invest ones car-fuel/tires/oil/wear and tear depreciation, to go to/return from the store, for beer. In MY sphere of influence this contract tended to inverted the parties responsibilities depending on who who got their work study check, or allowance from dad, closest to assignation of terms.
Naturally, sometimes third party (Seniors/Grad students/TAs/) were brought into the formula.
“Remember all that “free” pizza- bitch? Fork over and I’ll fly!”, and “labor” was fungable.
“Here’s the paid/cold beer. Proofread/ correct/ type my Psych paper!”
How about…..”We’ve paid for your criminals/ unsustainable liabilities/ welfare rent seekers for years.
Pay for the wall, provide the “scrap” metal reinforcement, and concrete. WE’LL provide the (convict) labor.”
NO? perhaps we can just return the convicted illegal aliens, and assorted narco contraband, that came through Mexico, regardless of “origin”,via the very same NAFTA “pipelines” that we will subsequently “recycle” to build the wall.
SOME HOW, we’ll manage to get by without the “American” denim. cars, produce, migratory prison guests, and air conditioners.
- CaptDMO | 09/03/2016 @ 05:39
“we have prospered from buying maybe half as much house as we could’ve afforded”
No you didn’t. You “bought” (is that lien free?) 100% of house, financing, assorted legislated rent-seekers extortion, repairs, assessed taxes, HVAC, internal water, and “OMG does this EVER END?”eternal maintenance (do ALL that yourself do you?) as you could’ve afforded.
For MOST folks, plowed roads, nearby hydrants, and the PROMISE of timely Police/Fire dept/Ambulance
seem to be worth it.
ALL veteran home “owners”/ tax PAYERS, know all this of course, it just constantly needs to be reiterated for the dreamers. (what WAS that original Cary Grant/ Myrna Loy movie?)
- CaptDMO | 09/06/2016 @ 05:03
But, that’s my point. “Can afford,” somehow, has mutated as a concept into whatever the bank says, and banks calculate this according to the bank’s interest. Their perfect scenario: Mr. & Mrs. are in debt up to their eyes until the day they drop. But never miss any payments. Minimum payments.

We didn’t work from that formula, so we have been actually paying off debts. Prospering.

What are these “plowed roads” of which you speak??
- mkfreeberg | 09/06/2016 @ 09:31
I live in that part of the planet where Anthro Global Flagelants have failed to convince the Earth to eliminate ice falling from the sky,
but NOT enough that tourists/ immigrants can be convinced that driving slowly on TOP of it, if simply packed down, would be a better plan for them to trailer their urban all wheel drive, SUV towed snowmobiles, XC, snow shoes, helmets, and skis to designated recreation areas with groomed trails and powered lifts.
Just to ensure employment for United Auto Workers, we scatter SALT around to ensure the rotation of their stock, and that the latest, newest, compliant, unrepairable modles of car/truck can proceed apace.
Consequently, “Jimmy” ( You know…Becka and Lou’s kid)) gets up at even STUPIDER o’clock in the morning than WE do to drive the loud diesel truck with a plow, and ENSURE our morning will include
clear the new “bank” across your driveway so you can get out. But that’s OK, we get an earlier than usual start on the day, what with the diesel truck with the steel blade scraping the asphalt, and chewing up the aprons, shoulders, and pot holes, USUALLY wakes us up. (But NEVER the womenfolk by some contracosmic injustice!)
- CaptDMO | 09/07/2016 @ 09:10
Woooooo….open tags in THERE somewhere!
- CaptDMO | 09/07/2016 @ 09:12
You never own it anyway. The taxes never end and they will take it away from you if you get too far behind, even if it’s paid off.

My husband bought a piece of river front property, before we met. In the way they do things in this county, they secretly changed the zoning to park. This is a pre-statehood donation land claim, so people have been here a long time. There is a double wide trailer on the place from the 70s. We can only replace it with a trailer from 2006 and newer. But it has to be the same size as the old one, and they don’t build them that small these days. We can’t build a house because it’s in the flood plain. The only option we have to repair it is through Labor & Industries, replacing it wall by wall.

To make it even more special, DNR is demanding removal of the dock. They told me I can move my boat into someone else’s moorage. The law reads that they have to give preference to upland property owners, but the courts do whatever the State wants. We found out from the city (and this place is in both city and county, to make it even more special) that DNR had the law changed to where you can’t have a dock unless you have a neighbor with upland property. You get to share one. A lot of folks will be surprised by that one.

There is a reason I hate bureaucrats with a white hot passion.
- teripittman | 09/09/2016 @ 09:55

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