House of Eratosthenes

Every now and then, some news story and/or study and/or news story about a study will come out, and it will outwardly state or subtly imply, this: Girls and young women are starving themselves in order to aspire to an unattainable body image that has been imposed upon them by a male-dominated society. Such pieces spring out at us like popcorn out of an uncovered frying pan, so don’t look to me to provide the links. Do your own search. The links change, after all, and the buzzwords don’t. Body image. Body conscious. Unattainable. Male-dominated. Culture. Society. Starving. Anorexia. Eating disorders. Oppressed.

The message is clear whether stated or not: It’s the fault of men.

Girls are too eager to please us. They’re starving themselves.

The ideal body style is unrealistic. Nobody really looks like that. Even the supermodels who look like that, when you remove the special lighting and special photography and special retouching and digital alteration, they don’t look like that. So the unattainable body image really is unattainable, in every sense, and us men are such filthy rotten bastards for pressuring women to be something they can never be.

Well you know, feminists started whining about stupid bullcrap right after I was born, and they aren’t going to stop until long after I’m dead. I can deal with feminist whining. It drives me nuts, however, that nobody steps forward to say don’t blame us. Yes, there’s a cultural movement afoot to embarrass women into a size 0, but the horny straight men aren’t driving that movement.

It’s fashion moguls. Most of whom are male…and homosexual.

It’s women.

It’s scientists, who refuse to be named.

And here’s a sterling example of what I’m talking about.

Many obese Americans don’t consider themselves obese, a new study finds.

The study included 104 white and black men and women, ages 45 to 64, who were asked to report their weight in pounds; categorize themselves as either underweight, normal weight, overweight, or obese; and estimate how much they would need to weigh in order to be considered obese.

Based on the participants’ body mass index (BMI), the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill researchers found there were 31 normal weight people, 40 overweight people and 33 obese people in the study group.

About 90 percent of the normal weight people and 85 percent of the overweight and obese people accurately self-reported their own weight and height, the researchers reported Tuesday at the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology meeting in San Francisco.

However, just 15 percent of obese people correctly considered themselves to be obese, compared with the 71 percent of normal-weight individuals and 73 percent of overweight people who classified themselves correctly.

The obese people were also more likely to overestimate how much they would need to weigh in order to be considered obese.

The researchers said their findings have important implications, because obese adults who don’t consider themselves obese are unlikely to heed public health messages about the dangers of obesity. Denial and misperception may be two factors that influence why obese people don’t consider themselves to be obese, the study author suggested.

Now take a look at the luxury this silly study afforded itself. It defined “correctly” as “in the same category as that derived by the BMI.” The BMI is a scale of obesity that…well, I think it would be fair to say it is cherished by egghead scientists, and found to be suspicious and highly dubious by “real” people.

I’m an even six feet tall. The BMI wants me to weigh between 175 and 180 pounds. By trial and error, real people like me have figured out what the scientists either can’t find out, or won’t talk about: The BMI is for people who don’t work out. And it’s for people who don’t work out, who are between about 5’3″ and 5’9″.

What do the biceps look like on a six-foot-tall man who weighs 175 pounds? How thick could they possibly be if he has that weight? What do his pecs look like?

But here’s another, even more important, point. What about the poor, poor, pitiful, oh-so-put-upon women? Who wants women to fit into the BMI? Horny men like me, or egghead scientists?

Sure, the feminists want to blame men who are actually attracted to women, filthy brutes that we are. But in my everday experiences, I only see the “unattainable” body image favored by the egghead scientists. The unnamed scientists, whose good names would likely be tarnished if they had bothered to be interviewed, and thus named, in the study quoted above. Which, you’ll notice, nobody did.

What do the lusty red-blooded men want? Well, let’s take a look.

Above you see contemporary pictures of Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan, and a 1965 picture of Raquel Welch. Kate and Lindsay are stylish and with-it, whereas Raquel is out of her time period. She’s oh, so 41 years ago. You can actually see guts above and behind her navel. And look at those hips! They’re round! She’s got breasts, she’s got thighs, and even her shoulders have some meat. This is where I’m supposed to say “ooh, icky, what a tub o’goo.”

Hey, I’m a straight male. People like me get to decide what’s “sexy.” You don’t let straight women and gay men decide what a sexy woman looks like; you leave that up to people like me. I’m the guy who is attracted to women. Never forget that.

And I’d hit Raquel.

Every red-blooded, straight male I know, or know about, would poke Raquel.

So where does the waif look come from? Don’t ask me. Nobody ever took a poll and included me in it, when the waif look got all fashionable. They asked the fashion moguls and mavens, most of whom aren’t attracted to women in the first place.

And it looks to me, like perhaps they asked some of these clipboard-carrying, propeller-beanie egghead researchers. Gotta fit into the BMI, and all that.

Horny men using their unfair dominance of a patriarchal society to force unattainable body standards on girls and young women? Sorry…this horny guy doesn’t see it. I’d send the first two packing, maybe not even pay their taxi fare, while rolling around naked under the sheets with Raquel until we ruptured the bedsprings and started a fire. And I think I speak for just about every straight guy on the planet in saying that.

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Don’t Blame MeWednesday, April 5th, 2006

Don’t Blame Me
Wednesday, April 5th, 2006