Alarming News: I like Morgan Freeberg. A lot.
American Digest: And I like this from "The Blog That Nobody Reads", because it is -- mostly -- about me. What can I say? I'm on an ego trip today. It won't last.
Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler: We were following a trackback and thinking "hmmm... this is a bloody excellent post!", and then we realized that it was just part III of, well, three...Damn. I wish I'd written those.
Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler: ...I just remembered that I found a new blog a short while ago, House of Eratosthenes, that I really like. I like his common sense approach and his curiosity when it comes to why people believe what they believe rather than just what they believe.
Brutally Honest: Morgan Freeberg is brilliant.
Dr. Melissa Clouthier: Morgan Freeberg at House of Eratosthenes (pftthats a mouthful) honors big boned women in skimpy clothing. The picture there is priceless--keep scrolling down.
Exile in Portales: Via Gerard: Morgan Freeberg, a guy with a lot to say. And he speaks The Truth...and it's fascinating stuff. Worth a read, or three. Or six.
Just Muttering: Two nice pieces at House of Eratosthenes, one about a perhaps unintended effect of the Enron mess, and one on the Gore-y environ-movie.
Mein Blogovault: Make "the Blog that No One Reads" one of your daily reads.
The Virginian: I know this post will offend some people, but the author makes some good points.
Poetic Justice: Cletus! Ah gots a laiv one fer yew...
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950’s, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know, we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but, sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot, and will not ever agree on what is right, so let’s just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, chalk it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own way.
Here is a model separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
We don’t like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we’ll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O’Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.)
We’ll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens. We’ll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO’s, and rednecks. We’ll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we’ll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks, and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we’ll help provide them security. We’ll keep our Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill.
We’ll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find. You can give everyone health care, if you can find any practicing doctors. We’ll continue to believe health care is a luxury and not a right. We’ll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I’m sure you’ll be happy to substitute Imagine, I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum By Ya, or We Are the World.
We’ll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you we’ll keep our history, our name, and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots, and if you do not agree, just hit delete.
In the spirit of friendly parting, I’ll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall.
Law Student and an AmericanP.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda.
It won’t happen. But who’s gonna stop it? If liberals really believe the nonsense that comes out of their mouths sometimes…none of them. So float it and see what happens.
King Solomon would approve, no doubt.
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Fixed, Morgan. Thanks.
- bpenni | 03/01/2009 @ 08:06Now about the moderation, tho… 😉
- bpenni | 03/01/2009 @ 08:07I’ve been noticing your old account had some kind of glitch, for quite awhile. Many’s the time I’ve asked myself “Why do I have to approve Buck’s comment, it’s not a first-time comment?”
Do let me know how this works out, I think the frustration will be reduced from here on.
- mkfreeberg | 03/01/2009 @ 13:15[…] Daphne My favorite male chauvinist pig in the whole world has a couple of fine entries posted. This deserves some attention, but the prolific bastard’s loaded umpteen entries since this morning and I don’t have […]
- In the House « Jaded Haven | 03/01/2009 @ 23:10Don’t we already have something like this proposed arrangement? I think it’s called “Canada.”
Is anyone else here a regular reader of the Alley Oop serial comic strip over at comics.com? Oop is a caveman, but travels back and forth through time with the aid of his friends who live in our time…stopping bad guys and their evil designs.
Anyway, at one point in the strip, he travelled to the year 2145. In this time, the United States had undergone a 2nd civil war, and this time had become permanently divided into “Crimsonia” and “Azuria” representing the red and blue states, respectively. (This was in print in 2001.) Naturally, Oop found himself in Crimsonia and on the receiving end of a harsh interrogation, accusing him of being a spy for the other states.
Your post makes some great points, but come on. You know that the blue states would be promptly invaded by some foreign power and need rescuing by us.
- cylarz | 03/01/2009 @ 23:20cylarz: ever heard of “poison pills”. Swallowing a blue state would be like that. Some victories are anythying but.
Anyway, if you did make a split like that, your guess of 15 years before needing help sounds way off. 4 sounds like a truer number to me.
- pdwalker | 03/02/2009 @ 05:58My God, what a beautiful dream. As the leftie states implode, there would be no need for annexation at all.
Allow anyone with the necessary common sense to apply for citizenship in our country. New citizens would necessarily pass a course in civics which would include knowledge of the Constitution as well as American and World history. Failure would mean failure; by all means try again.
All signs, services and education would be in English. Every human would be held to the same standards. If you really insist upon being viewed as a victim, please remain in the failed State that spawned you; I feel for you, Brother, but I just can’t reach you.
Period.
- rob | 03/03/2009 @ 15:35[…] Kind of a rehash of the divorce agreement. […]
- House of Eratosthenes | 08/16/2010 @ 07:23