House of Eratosthenes

Yes, it’s still full of holes. I’m not saying if I was Todd or Sarah Palin I’d be inviting David Letterman over for dinner soon…or ever…in fact, I think I can still reassure you he’d be on my permanent block-list, since I’m from Earth and have red blood, and the situation is really quite clear. He’s just a fellow I wouldn’t care to have in my inner circle, y’know? But you can reach that conclusion, and still at the same time accept the apology.

He’s just a phony-edgy-comedian who got caught up in his own cleverness and said something indecent. He shot his mouth off and asked questions later…which is, when you think about it…kind of the job description. I think this is good enough for us to move on. I know Gov. and Mr. Palin have the final word on that, but that’s my take on it. David Letterman’s a dimbulb who didn’t mean any real harm. He’s just guilty of being a dimbulb.

“And then I was watching the Jim Lehrer ‘Newshour’ – this commentator, the columnist Mark Shields, was talking about how I had made this indefensible joke about the 14-year-old girl, and I thought, ‘Oh, boy, now I’m beginning to understand what the problem is here. It’s the perception rather than the intent.’ It doesn’t make any difference what my intent was, it’s the perception. And, as they say about jokes, if you have to explain the joke, it’s not a very good joke. And I’m certainly – ” (audience applause) “- thank you. Well, my responsibility – I take full blame for that. I told a bad joke. I told a joke that was beyond flawed, and my intent is completely meaningless compared to the perception. And since it was a joke I told, I feel that I need to do the right thing here and apologize for having told that joke. It’s not your fault that it was misunderstood, it’s my fault. That it was misunderstood.” (audience applauds) “Thank you. So I would like to apologize, especially to the two daughters involved, Bristol and Willow, and also to the Governor and her family and everybody else who was outraged by the joke. I’m sorry about it and I’ll try to do better in the future. Thank you very much.” (audience applause)

Two points to make here.

First — I still want to keep up my personal war on this brand of humor. You know what I mean; you must; for I have already explained it. That thing where, your joke isn’t really funny but it is calculated to offend and annoy a selected demographic, thereby pleasing another selected demographic that is elated whenever unpleasantness is created for the former demographic.

Conservative, liberal, I don’t give a shit. That just isn’t funny. When you’re in your forty-third year there is some effort involved in staying up for late-night comedy, and I want to see something truly funny. A bunch of bullshit about “I’m on your side all you hip people, so that makes me a cool comedian!” is a waste of my time and my DVR space.

Second. One of my favorite grocery cashiers rang up my purchase this weekend, and he happened to comment on how much he liked my pro-Palin shirt. “I don’t want her running the country, but she is a wonderful broad,” he said. Now that I’m seeing some of these comments (“I don’t like her politics, but this joke was…” et cetera) my mind flashes back to that conversation.

I have a question that is coming to me because of Sarah Palin’s new place in our evolving culture. This “I don’t like her politics BUT” place she has in our culture. Every time Gov. Palin’s name comes up and she is unquestionably in the right, which is nearly always, here comes that tired old disclaimer. “I don’t like her politics, or I don’t want to see her running anything important, but.”

And here’s a real quick bunny trail. “I don’t want her running the country” is a strange thing to say, Mister Cashier — because my shirt didn’t say “Sarah Palin is a swell gal” or “Sarah Palin is a cool broad.” My shirt said I did want her running things. It said “Palin in 2012.” Because I do want her making decisions. I think she’d do a better job than the folks who really are running things. A far, far better job…even if she is a chick. She was, and is, the best man for the job, period. Better than Barry, better than Mac, better than Doctor Ron, better than Mitt, better than Rudy. A real man can admit when the skirt is in the right, and that rule applies here. ‘Fess up, guys.

But back to the subject at hand. Here’s my question.

What is the MOST reprehensible position Sarah Palin has on anything? What is the most awful, repugnant, opprobrious, (breaking out the thesaurus here) scurrilous, reproachful, ignominious, inglorious, shameful, abhorrent, notorious, dishonorable, sinful…aw c’mon, by now, surely you get the picture…insert impressive list of synonyms here…position Gov. Sarah Palin has on anything? It’s such a popular thing to say, surely somewhere someone has to be able to answer to this.

Is it — when she is pregnant with a child that will be disabled, she decides not to kill him?

Is it — when we’re spending billions of dollars subsidizing terrorists by importing our oil, she’d rather have us digging it out of our own domestic reserves?

Is it — when she’s a Republican, and she’s eyeball to eyeball with Republican corruption, she takes it on anyway because she’s got more balls than some of the men have?

Is it — when a bottom-feeding ankle-biting late-night hack comedian makes a sexual joke about her fourteen-year-old daughter, she says & does something about it?

Are those the terrible, awful policy positions that it’s so fashionable for people to oppose?

Someone clue me in in the comments below, please. I’m dead flat-ass serious; I’d really like to know.

I’d still give good money to see Todd Palin break both his arms. Oh, I’m sorry, did that sound like a troglodyte with two daughters?
- chunt31854 | 06/15/2009 @ 22:59
“David Letterman’s a dimbulb who didn’t mean any real harm. ”

“your joke isn’t really funny but it is calculated to offend and annoy a selected demographic”

Huh?
- tim | 06/16/2009 @ 09:04
No contradiction there. It’s that new-wave “edgy” humor that says, as long as the right people are being offended, no harm is being done.

That’s one of the reasons why, if Letterman’s joke was at the expense of the Obama girls, there’d be no disagreement anywhere about what to do whatsoever.
- mkfreeberg | 06/16/2009 @ 11:42
Morgan,

Mister Cashier just wants a candidate that he can support without explaining why. Pain/Work Avoidance (hereafter termed PWA).

There comes several points in every person’s life when they realize there were things they were supposed to be doing for the last several years, but weren’t; and it bites them in the rear when they discover it. Perhaps it’s parenting, when you’ve suddenly realized that the choices you made as an unruly teenager have future negative consequences as an adult (no career, no morals, no work ethic, therefore no ability to use your life as an example to your children, etc.). Perhaps it’s voting, when you vote in someone who convinces you he can solve your problems (money, guilt, feelings of helplessness). Enablers in the MSM have convinced you that there’s no need to vet the candidate by researching his policies or history (that’s hard work, and hard work hurts!) At no point does someone recognize that the PWA is the culprit.

The pain that comes at these points can only be mitigated by making another lazy decision: avoid pain/work some more (the double down). The drug of choice in the PWA spiral can sometimes come in the form of voting for a guy who promises an unrealistic amount, despite evidence that he cannot be what he claims. It can also be the soothing calm one temporarily receives when someone with no PWA in their life (Palin) is smugly destroyed. Logic has never entered the equation, nor will it.

Clean Living/Hard Work is its own reward: it’s simply not evident when you’re in the moment (making it a hard sell). I fear that the boomer generation has a lot of regret from their youth, but can’t admit it publicly – the evidence that they are doubling down is high. Talking about the “greatest generation” in glowing terms can’t help the boomer’s psyche either.

Palin comes off as someone who recognizes PWA and squashes it like a bug – earning the respect of like-minded folks such as yourself.
- wch | 06/16/2009 @ 17:27

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A Much Better ApologyMonday, June 15th, 2009

A Much Better Apology
Monday, June 15th, 2009