Archive for August, 2007

Depression is Over-Diagnosed

Friday, August 17th, 2007

MarvinWe learn via BBC News that a troublesome mental health professional has gone on record and made the startling claim that depression is being over-diagnosed.

Too many people are being diagnosed with depression when all they are is unhappy, a leading psychiatrist says.

Professor Gordon Parker claims the threshold for clinical depression is too low and risks treating normal emotional states as illness.

Writing in the British Medical Journal, he calls depression a “catch-all” diagnosis driven by clever marketing.
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The professor, who carried out a 15-year study of 242 teachers, found that more than three-quarters of them met the current criteria for depression.

He writes in the BMJ that almost everyone had symptoms such as “feeling sad, blue or down in the dumps” at some point in their lives – but this was not the same as clinical depression which required treatment.

He said prescribing medication may raise false hopes and might not be effective as there was nothing biologically wrong with the patient.

He said: “Over the last 30 years the formal definitions for defining clinical depression have expanded into the territory of normal depression, and the real risk is that the milder, more common experiences risk being pathologised.”

Hell’s bells, I coulda told you that. The signs are all there. “Ask your doctor about” commercials on the teevee. Speaking just for myself, this is damning evidence in the courtroom between my two ears. Sure, developing a new drug or medicine is an expensive and financially risky proposition, and once you’ve secured the patent you’ve got a right to recoup your investment just like any other good capitalist. But there’s something terribly wrong with sending flocks of potential patients into doctors’ offices to “ask about” things, especially things specifically designed to alter an emotional state. Somehow, that just rubs me the wrong way.

But there are other things. There’s all this subtle lecturing about the clinical state of depression, with an implication that those of us who have not suffered from it are unfit to comment on it or form reasoned opinions about it. Well, that is probably true in some cases. What about some of the other cases? Do we have safeguards in place to make sure people are not placed on mind-altering prescriptions, when all they are is unhappy? You don’t have to interact with people for too many years at all, before you meet some folks who are genuinely unhappy and don’t know why, because their life experiences have been too narrow and they lack the emotional depth required to figure out what might make them truly happy.

The subtle “it’s a valid medical diagnosis” lecturing is sufficiently exuberant to reach pro-active status — as in “just in case anyone thinks there’s nothing to this, they need to MYOB.” I wouldn’t have too much difficulty at all finding examples of that. But I have yet to see anyone say something like “just in case anyone thinks we’re not doing anything to keep this from being over-diagnosed, here’s what we’re doing to prevent that.” The abundance of one with a complete dearth of the other, raises my red flags.

Is over-diagnosis at least possible? It strikes me as incredibly awkward to try to mount an argument that it could not be. Sure, you can achieve genuine happiness without reaching emotional maturity, but it seems self-evident that you can’t identify genuine happiness without reaching that maturity. False happiness is incredibly deceptive.

In fact, there’s something about spending too much time or energy worrying about happiness, that strikes me as a possible sign of that lack of emotional maturity. I’ve often heard some folks say “the four years I spent in San Francisco, was the one time I was really happy,” or if they come from broken homes they might say “the time we lived in Albuquerque, was the one time that as a family we were happy.”

Personally, I haven’t been able to do this too much — point back to some eon in my own life story, and say “that there is when I was happy.” I can single out some stretches and say “that’s when I had it really good, but I didn’t realize it until I made some dreadful mistake and brought it to an inglorious end.” I can certainly do that a handful of times. But I can’t come up with a single moment when I was sitting around contemplating how deliriously happy I was. Exquisitely miserable, yeah. But on those occasions, if I could march into some doctor’s office and ask about some goop that would make me all happy-happy-joy-joy, I wouldn’t have been interested. I knew what was making me miserable and it wasn’t something any goop would fix.

But here’s what really scares me: How come I have to wait until late 2007 to see a sawbones with some balls point out that this over-diagnosis is a possibility? How come when you run an article going the other way…”depression is real, so if you think you suffer from it be sure to contact your doctor and ask about medication”…it’s okay to print it up without including the opposing point of view. Whereas, with this guy pointing out the possibility of a diagnosis, by the time you get to the fourth paragraph they’re already running the obligatory devil’s advocate, and one gathers the impression there would be an unpleasant conversation with someone somewhere if they did not:

But another psychiatrist writing in the journal contradicts his views, praising the increased diagnosis of depression.

Professor Ian Hickie writes that an increased diagnosis and treatment of depression has led to a reduction in suicides and removal of the old stigma surrounding mental illness.
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…Professor Hickie said if only the most severe cases were treated, people would die unnecessarily.

So you have to include an opposing view if you dare to run an article in the BBC News, and apparently in the British Medical Journal as well, poo-pooing the crescendoing diagnosis of depression. But it seems a safe assumption if you run an article praising it instead, no opposing view is necessary.

Why is that? Well…we could say if you are suffering from diagnosis and you fail to get a prescription of what you need, your life might be in danger. But your life might be in danger, as well, if you’re suffering from what Dr. Parker calls “the milder, more common experiences” and actually acquire a prescription you don’t really need. I mean, mightn’t it? I’m not a doctor or a suicide counselor, but it seems a safe assumption to make.

Whereas, people make money when things are prescribed, and they don’t when they’re not.

So what I’m seeing here, is an industry with a need to police itself, failing to do so. Until I see evidence that there’s something else going on. Skepticism like Dr. Parker’s, if there are no concrete facts to directly contradict it, shouldn’t be so occasional. Something’s wrong here.

United

Thursday, August 16th, 2007

I have a prediction: After George W. Bush, the most “polarizing” President of the United States in recent memory, goes home and someone else takes his place, this country is still going to be deeply divided. In fact, you’ll still see his name tossed around rather frequently, as people argue about who’s doing the crappiest job rolling back his “disastrous” policies and who’s secretly in league with the oil cartels that already received such unfairly favorable treatment from you-know-who.

I don’t think George Bush has anything to do with the division. He was President for eight months before the September 11 attacks, and squeaker-election-victory aside, all the criticism I heard heaped on him during those eight months was fairly mundane. You’d hear it about any Republican candidate for high office in this era. Oh, he won’t fund stem cell research. Him and his oil buddies. Sunday school church boy. Oppressing women and gays, blah blah blah blah blah.

We’re divided because we’ve been living in an ivory tower, quibbling about trivial crap like whether to go Betamax or VHS, and the dark-age world came knocking on our ivory doors with its medieval death & destruction and we don’t know what to do. Half of us understand that when you jettison yourself into a future Jean-Luc Picard utopian universe wherein everyone just gets along, there’ll be other folks who aren’t along for the ride and will kill and kill until they themselves are killed. We get it. The other half doesn’t get it. The other half thinks more Picard-style monologues must be the answer; eventually the Romulans, or whoever, will see the error of their ways. That is the cause of the conflict. And before 9/11/01, there was little reason to engage in it, compared with what came afterward.

President Bush is simply a figurehead in that conflict.

And as Exhibit A, I would offer the harmonious, unifying shindig among Illinois democrats, in their attempt to solidify behind the most peaceful, Picard-like candidate that can be found for the upcoming elections anywhere:

Warring factions of Illinois’ Democratic Party turned unity day Wednesday at the Illinois State Fair into a display of name-calling, booing and apologizing for a feud that almost shut down state government.

Organizers tried to focus on their common goal of electing Sen. Barack Obama president, but the diversion couldn’t paper over deep cracks within the party, fissures caused by the caustic 10-week budget stalemate between Democratic leaders.

“It’s embarrassing — it’s not the way people envision their leaders acting,” Treasurer Alexi Giannoulias said. “I think the public is getting sick and tired of this.”

In an oblique reference to the House speaker, the governor slammed “some even in our own party who cynically sit in the shadows and are working to prevent us from getting health care for all the people of our state.”

And the speaker fired back at the governor, saying his latest budget move violates the state Constitution.

State Comptroller Dan Hynes and Attorney General Lisa Madigan, who have waged public feuds with the governor, skipped the State Fair, where they would have had to share the stage with Blagojevich.

Crowds at the Democratic pep rally appeared smaller than at past Governor’s Days. But it was unclear whether the infighting or the humid 97-degree weather was the cause.

I think that treasurer guy is a hundred percent wrong. People, and democrats in particular, want their leaders to act exactly like this. The back-and-forth sniping is undignified, sure, but people love it when their guy, who shares their values, launches an attack fit for the schoolyard on someone else who doesn’t share their values quite so well. They eat it up and they can’t get enough of it. “There, take THAT!”

In fact, it’s rather ironic isn’t it? If you hate war and want to end war, the democrats are here to represent you. And yet they hardly look like a band of merry ambassadors who are equipped and prepared to end any fighting overnight, do they?

They talk about issues that have no “bad guy,” like natural disasters or diseases, and they have to insert one. There seem to be a lot of folks who think this is what an anti-fighting political party looks like. I wonder if they know something I don’t, because it doesn’t look that way to me.

Mutilation for Vanity

Thursday, August 16th, 2007

It could be worthwhile to follow North Denver News for awhile. There is an editor there, maybe more than one, who shares some of my favorite pet peeves. But the satire there might be a little bit too good.

Thomas Martel, 28, of Bonnie Brae is a big guy. So he has a hard time using the features on ever-shrinking user interfaces on devices like his new iPhone. At least, he did, until he had his thumbs surgically altered in a revolutionary new surgical technique known as “whittling.”

“From my old Treo, to my Blackberry, to this new iPhone, I had a hard time hitting the right buttons, and I always lost those little styluses,” explains Martel. “Sure, the procedure was expensive, but when I think of all the time I save by being able to use modern handhelds so much faster, I really think the surgery will pay for itself in ten to fifteen years. And what it’s saving me in frustration – that’s priceless.”…While Martel’s new thumbs now appear small and effeminate in comparison to his otherwise very large hands, he says he can still lift “pretty much anything I could lift before the surgery – though opening spaghetti sauce jars has been a problem. That was a big surprise.”

Three days later, the editor had to drop a note because too many people didn’t pick up on the humor. This is a good thing, because it involved taking a complete inventory of the >points being made by the original piece — of which there were more than one:

…that U.S. society accepts plastic surgery and decorative deformation of the human body for vanity, but not other reasons; that technology has become a new cult phenomena, in which items are praised or ridiculed based upon tribal allegiances instead of functionality and performance; and we like to pretend that some of our writers have a sense of humor.
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Additionally, many commentators have derided Mr. Martel for stupidity first and foremost, which may indicate something about their credulity. In an era when fake news, like Paris Hilton, has crowded out real news and public debate, the lesson is that skeptical consumption of information, whether from the North Denver News, the New York Times, or the National Review, is a must.

I appreciate that first point the most because it’s the most subtle. This queasy feeling we have about people mutilating their bodies to better interface with technology is understandable: Is it not the nature of technology to be changing all of the time? How long will this bodily mutilation, which one presumes will be carried to the grave, deliver on the expected benefits?

And yet when the conversation shifts to even more excessive bodily alteration for social ingratiation and no higher purpose, the horror subsides instantly. In fact, it seems the hottest trends in alteration have to do with alterations that are most permanent, to accommodate the fashions that are the most fickle. A navel piercing is “in”; a tattoo is more “in” than that; an enormous tattoo, shoulder to shoulder, that couldn’t possibly be removed without grafting and invasive surgery on the level of what you’d receive after surviving a gasoline fire, is more “in” than that. But a fictional character modifies his thumbs in order to more efficiently perform useful work on a Treo or a Blackberry, and he is excoriated as an idiot.

Explanation? It’s quite simple, really: We’re bored.

Wonderful Unbiased New York Times

Wednesday, August 15th, 2007

Every now and then during a good-natured debate with a leftist, I will be virtually commanded to believe something uncritically because it appeared in the New York Times. DO…YOU…DARE…TO…QUESTION…SOMETHING that appeared in America’s most prestigious newspaper?

I’ve not tried beating them about the head with the cudgel that is the Jayson Blair scandal. Not sure why. I just figure that’s bait for some kind of trap, like they’re waiting for me to do it. Wonder what would happen.

Well…we all know the New York Times is about as objective and unbiased as Barbra Streisand, maybe plus a few proofreaders that she’s missing from her own payroll. We know this. But every now and then, it’s good to see some evidence so it can be better understood what’s over there in Manhattan. And look at what Mr. Johnson found.

Yeah yeah yeah, there’s no evidence this edit was done by Mr. Sulzburger himself…probably some low-ranking guy in the mail room or something whose opinions are not necessarily those of the newspaper’s.

But what’s more plausible. Someone at the New York Times was defacing the Wikipedia page on his lunch hour, in a coat closet somewhere, in complete secrecy, like Clark Kent changing into his Superman clothes, and oh we must make absolutely sure nobody ever finds out about it…since we all know hating George Bush is a frowned-upon practice at the New York Times. ++chortle++ Or, could it have been just one more specimen of the juvenile “Hey look at me, I hate Bush even more than you do, please like me!!!” self-ingratiation ritual we see on left-wing blogs all the time? Is it too out of the realm of the probable to suppose such a culture might exist within the hallowed walls of our nation’s most revered and highly-regarded newspaper?

Tell ya what. For the uninitiated, just skim through the material in the front section for a few days in a row. Then get back to me on that.

Yeah, people like Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh are slanted in the other direction. The thing is, they package themselves that way. In 2007 America, while our conservatives present themselves as conservative, our leftists present themselves as centrists, and we let ’em get away with it and call it “mainstream news.”

Update: We find out about this website, courtesy of TOTALFARK subscriber KnucklePopper. Very informative and useful. Thanks, KP!

Nifong’s Disbarment Unfair

Wednesday, August 15th, 2007

Mike Nifong says his treatment was unfair.

When former Durham District Attorney Mike Nifong mailed in his law license last week, he also included a note bemoaning “the fundamental unfairness” of the North Carolina State Bar’s handling of his ethics case.

Nifong was disbarred for his handling of rape charges against three Duke University men’s lacrosse players. State prosecutors later dismissed the charges and declared the players innocent.

In the Aug. 7 letter, Nifong complained about a revision the State Bar issued to its written ruling, which had omitted one of the counts included in an oral ruling.

Robert Mosteller, a Duke law professor, noticed the missing count.

“Am I just missing this reference, is there an explanation, or just an apparent oversight?” he wrote in an e-mail to the State Bar.

The count was added in an amended order by F. Lane Williamson, a Charlotte lawyer who headed the disciplinary panel.

“Mr. Williamson’s e-mail assertion that the addition of a new conclusion of law based on the request of a Duke University law professor is merely a ‘clerical correction’ is preposterous beyond belief, and is further evidence of the fundamental unfairness with which this entire procedure has been conducted,” Nifong wrote.

Aw…

I am not a big fan of this guy. The beef with him that culminated in his disbarment, had everything to do with “fundamental unfairness” so it speaks poorly of his mental acumen that he’d see fit to toss that phrase into his sniveling protest. Did he intend the irony, or is he completely unaware of it?

If I personally had a hand in punishing Nifong, and was nursing some doubts about whether I’d done the right thing for whatever reason, this latest event would purge those doubts straight-away. Nifong doesn’t seem to think he did anything wrong. If that’s not the case, he is narcissistic beyond belief.

Methusaleh Fad

Wednesday, August 15th, 2007

Via Rick, we find out that Rachel saw a thug.

Even though nobody reads this blog, the nobodies who do, are well-acquainted with my attitude about droopy trousers. In a way, I’m grateful that they’re here because they help to clarify what goes on when people think in groups. The question that would remain unsettled, if not for them, goes something like this: When you make a decision as part of a large group, are you simply less likely to reach a rational conclusion? Or could it be that you are predisposed to arrive at conclusions that are irrational?

Baggy pantsThe baggy pants fad, and fashion in general, help to answer this. If group-think simply had a disorienting effect on us, depriving us of the attraction that we have toward logical ideas when doing our thinking in solitude, the “bad fads” would have about the same lifespan as the good ones. Baggy pants is an objectively bad fashion; its irrationality is measurable, and not a matter of personal opinion. Boys who insist on wearing their baggy pantaloons every day, interrogated by outraged parents, defend the practice because “the girls like it.” That is probably the most durable test we can construct for bad ideas — someone’s offered an opportunity to defend them, and their defense is going to be to punt to someone else.

Plus, you can’t run in the damn things. If there are activities to be associated with fashion items, the activities associated with this one all seem to be illegal. Well, I just think when you break the law, you ought to be wearing something suitable for running.

The lifespan of a healthy dog or cat has been surpassed by the baggy pants fad: about twelve years, give or take a couple years. Quick — name another fashion item that has endured for six. Beehive hairdo? No. Goatee? Not yet. White go go boots? Mutton chop sideburns? The preppy look? Not even close.

If there is to be a Methusaleh fad, a fad lasting longer than any other in modern times, does the the droopy-drawer look even begin to offer qualities that would distinguish it as a reasonable candidate? Well let’s see…it accentuates the male crack. You know, I don’t swing that way, but it seems doubtful to me that even people who are attracted to men, want to see that. It’s impractical. Twenty years ago it was fashionable for girls with huge breasts to be wearing tight sweaters. Good times…well, you can do a lot of things in a tight sweater. You can’t run with baggy pants on. I think you can run better wearing a bag of cement than you can wearing some baggy pants.

As for the message sent with the fashion fad, this has got to be the most disastrous attribute of the “can smuggle a watermelon in my crotch” craze. It is worn by spoiled urban parasitic youth who want to look more masculine than they are. It got started, it would appear, as a calling card among gay men. So let’s say the potential for ambiguity seems to run a little high here.

Good fadIt’s the longest-running fad in modern times. Those teeny bikini bottoms the ladies used to wear on their swimsuits, riding low on the hips…that’s an example of a “good fad” if ever there was one…they looked great. After two or three years some nameless faceless unaccountable invisible fashion emperor in New York, declared enough was enough. “Boy shorts” are now the “in” thing for feminine swimwear. No such moratorium has been declared on these hoodlum-pants that hoodlums wear doing their hoodlum things, right before leading the police on a hoodlum foot chase that they can’t maintain because their hoodlum pants keep falling off their hoodlum butts.

Maybe it’s all a secret plan to foil crime. I dunno. But the evidence is in: When you go along to get along in a large group, you aren’t simply dissuaded from making logical decisions, it seems you’re actually motivated to make illogical ones. There’s one — just one — twelve-year-long fad in modern history, and it has to do with failing to accomplish the sole objective of wearing clothes, presuming there can be only one: getting your damn ass crack concealed and keeping it that way.

Spreading Doubt

Tuesday, August 14th, 2007

Don’t you just love that headline? It’s not mine. But I’m going to steal it. I’m going to use it next time I’m the protagonist in an argument, and the thing I’m trying to support is fragile and dubious to the point of being a caricature of itself. “I don’t have a tax liability,” I will tell the tax man; and when he comes up with the fliers and circulars and other printed materials the Internal Revenue Service has printed up to handle problem cases like me, I’ll just ignore any logical points on his side and tell him “see, there you are spreading doubt.”

“God is a man and He wants you to get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.” My lady might use logic to open this assertion to scrutiny, i.e., wouldn’t the Divine Being make His will better known to her, if He were to shrink my waistline instead of expanding it? Lately, I’m lacking that cosmetic “could use a sandwich” look. And if her place is in the kitchen, how come her feet can fit into shoes? “Aha,” I’ll say, “you are a doubt-spreader.”

In yesterday’s edition of Newsweek, editor Sharon Begley is exactly what she calls others. Her article, The Truth About Denial, tattles on a “well-funded machine” that is “running at full throttle — and continuing to shape both government policy and public opinion.”

I would have to ask which side is really pushing the throttle of a well-funded machine.

To compile an inventory of actual fact presented by Ms. Begley, and correlate it with the inventory of points she wishes to make with those facts, is to undergo a truly surreal experience. Exhibit A is the public opinion polls. By now, anybody who’s paid attention is well aware of how these work: More and more people are convinced global warming is a real problem and it’s man-made, so anybody left at the kiddie table had better get with it and hop on the bandwagon. Y’know, before it’s too late and all. But NO…that is not what Begley wants to tell us. She’s going the other way. The public opinion polls show we’ve been pretty slow to drink the Kool-aid and demand seconds, and this is evidence of the sinister workings of that well lubricated machine.

Just last year, polls found that 64 percent of Americans thought there was “a lot” of scientific disagreement on climate change; only one third thought planetary warming was “mainly caused by things people do.” In contrast, majorities in Europe and Japan recognize a broad consensus among climate experts that greenhouse gases—mostly from the burning of coal, oil and natural gas to power the world’s economies—are altering climate. A new NEWSWEEK Poll finds that the influence of the denial machine remains strong. Although the figure is less than in earlier polls, 39 percent of those asked say there is “a lot of disagreement among climate scientists” on the basic question of whether the planet is warming; 42 percent say there is a lot of disagreement that human activities are a major cause of global warming. Only 46 percent say the greenhouse effect is being felt today.

Now, read that again. Two polls, or sets of polls, one year apart. Last year, 64 percent of us were skeptics. We thought there was “a lot” of disagreement among scientists. That metric has dropped from 64 to 39 in just twelve months. The point here, if I’m understanding it right, is that this evil machine is humming along as a model of efficiency because the 39 are still there.

Wow, if I were on an iron lung I really wouldn’t want a machine that works that well. In fact, when you think about this a little while longer it becomes evident that there must be another, better-funded, better-oiled, higher-performance machine at work here. I wonder when Begley will talk about that.

Oopsie, there I go spreading doubt.

Here’s something I’d like to know about the diabolical doubt-spreading machine: Why? I mean sure, you’ve got idiots like me who doubt global warming even though we’re not in a position to watch the pro-global-warming scientists compile their reports and don’t have access to the actual raw data, beyond the charts and graphs each side finds expedient to present to us. But we’re just big dummies, part of the 39% who don’t get it. We’re rats being led into the ocean by the Pied Piper of Hamlin, just doing what we’re told. What about the Piper? If you follow our food chain upward, you’re going to get to the big bosses, and I guess these are oil industry executives and the scientists they’ve bought off — people who know the planet is facing certain doom, and are fooling imbeciles like me into thinking it just isn’t so.

What’s their angle in this? They want to sell more petroleum products and increase the dollars-per-share in the corporations they manage…on a dying planet? This seems like a plan, assuming it does indeed exist somewhere, that could use a little bit more thinking-out.

But there’s more. How’s this for an eyebrow-raiser:

It was 98 degrees in Washington on Thursday, June 23, 1988, and climate change was bursting into public consciousness. The Amazon was burning, wildfires raged in the United States, crops in the Midwest were scorched and it was shaping up to be the hottest year on record worldwide. A Senate committee, including Gore, had invited NASA climatologist James Hansen to testify about the greenhouse effect, and the members were not above a little stagecraft. The night before, staffers had opened windows in the hearing room. When Hansen began his testimony, the air conditioning was struggling, and sweat dotted his brow. It was the perfect image for the revelation to come. He was 99 percent sure, Hansen told the panel, that “the greenhouse effect has been detected, and it is changing our climate now.”

The theme that permeates this article, and is supported in all other paragraphs, is that there really is no reason to doubt global warming aside from the sinister manipulations of public opinion that have been engineered through this doubt machine. And yet — for reasons that still aren’t quite clear to me — Begley thought it would be appropriate to toss in a humdinger of a reason, existing entirely outside that machine.

I’m sorry. I don’t wish to offend anyone. But it seems inescapable to me: if you can read about politically-motivated congressional staffers sabotaging the air conditioning system in the capitol to make the next day’s session a whole lot sweatier, just to be able to sell global warming as a public relations product — and not feel at least the stirrings of good old-fashion logically-based non-machine-inspired doubt, not even a tiny bit — you’re just nuts.

I realize people can go to great lengths to sell things to the public, and those things can still turn out to be true. But the subject under discussion is the public’s inability to decide the issue outside the realm of politics, through a sensible weighing of fact. And when you go through the pro-global-warming exhibits and start pitching out anything that’s just a lot of rhetoric, including the “Six thousand scientists ALL agree that blah blah blah,” you’re not left with a whole lot. Temperature went up about 1.5 Fahrenheit, so they say…pictures of sad-looking polar bears on the covers of magazines. That’s about it.

Contrasted with the facts about the global warming cheerleading machine: People monkeying with the air conditioning in the capitol, people writing up scary articles because it’s their job to do so. With very, very few exceptions, everyone playing this thing up has a career connected to it. And that includes Mr. Gore. It seems to be really hard to find anyone trying to “raise awareness” of global warming…who isn’t in the business of doing exactly that. Someone who’s genuinely trying to save the planet. And this kind of dovetails into that long list of things we’d be doing if the dire warnings had truth and confidence behind them.

They don’t. The dire warnings are just slogans, and it’s pretty easy to prove that they are this and nothing more.

We’re running out of time, if we procrastinate a little more it might be too late, is that it? Here’s a challenge: Try to get a global warming chicken little to stick to that theme, throughout the exploration of a plan that is supposed to fix the problem. Changing light bulbs in my house to a greener model. Mmmkay, so if I don’t do this, and soon, we’re going to cross some point of no return. If I use the new light bulbs all will be well? Or it will extend the window of opportunity to act?

What is this wonderful thing we are supposed to ultimately be doing, or getting ready to be doing, as we nibble on our fingernails wondering if we can be stirred into action quickly enough? Has anyone measured how long we have to get ‘er done? Can we see some statistics on this? Not vague stuff like “act before ten or fifteen years or it might be too late.” Specifics. Carbon tons. Saturation quotas. Dates. The global warming hype machine is demanding hefty sacrifices; it relies on these global warming climate models that the machine continues to keep telling me about, every week, every month, every year. This is what those models are for — digesting some statistics, producing others.

How come when I ask about these specifics the chicken littles keep telling me to “open such-and-such a report” or “go to such-and-such a website”? Why aren’t the specifics out there? I mean, I think that’s a reasonable question — people like Sharon Begley are concerned that the climate change denial machine is working oh, so incredibly well. This seems to me to be an opportunity to make it work not quite so well. So how come someone hasn’t already done that?

How big is Sharon Begley’s car, anyway?

I Made a New Word IV

Monday, August 13th, 2007

SNUL: “Sorry No Updates Lately.” (n.): A post in a blog that is constructed for no purpose whatsoever, other than to take note of the author’s incredibly busy schedule lately, or loss of Internet connection, or taking on a second job, or what-not.

2. One who regularly writes and posts SNULs.

(v.) The act of publishing SNULs.

I don’t want to be too hard on the SNULs, because I have some very good blogger friends who’ve been known to SNUL from time to time and some of them do it in a way that it can be entertaining. I hope none of them come by, see this, and get their knickers in a twist about it…I don’t mean any offense to the individuals. But overall, I see this as a form of pollution. It’s like having a dog in a super-dense suburban neighborhood (more on this below). Or fisking, or phlacing, or WAGTOCPAN, or letting your child push around a shopper-in-training grocery cart at the store. These things all have it in common that they involve a magnitude of environmental damage on a curvilinear relationship with how many people are doing it. Two adorable moppets in a trendy upscale grocery store pushing “shopper in training” carts, cause four times as much destruction to an “environment” of sorts, as just one them would. Three moppets would do nine times the damage…four would do sixteen. The simple formula seems to hold, indefinitely.

Given that the above is true, then, each person who contemplates a prospect of engaging in any of the above, in order to be environmentally responsible, would have to first consider how many people are already doing it. If the saturation is already on the heavy side, the ancillary damage being done by each new participant would become considerable.

SNUL SaturationAnd so this blog, which nobody actually reads anyway, frowns with schoolmarmish disdain on the practice of SNUL. We note that the Internet as we know it in 2007, is saturated with godawful amounts of it already; therefore the ancillary damage done by each new participant is unacceptably high. The saturation that exists already is sufficient to elevate this allocation of Internet space, into the Big Six. There is, of course, porn; there are messages excoriating President Bush either for being evil, creative and sophisticated enough to fool everybody, or for being such a drooling idiot as to disgust everybody (oftentimes both at once, believe it or not); there are snotty atheist comments about my “sky fairy,” carefully calculated to inflict maximum insult on believers like myself, and holding the atheist religion as the one true religion, just because, while simultaneously scolding “real” religions for supposedly doing exactly the same thing; there are MySpace pages with horrible odious background music. There are miscellaneous items such as “Registry Cleaner Recommended,” how to make it bigger and give her the satisfaction she deserves, refinance your house, there’s the perky lady congratulating you for winning two iPod Nanos…and then there is SNUL. “Sorry I haven’t made any updates lately, but…”

People who say they hate blogs, are quick to criticize bloggers for daring to upload inane drivel along the lines of “I can’t stand Jack in the Box heads on car antennas” or some such. With the phenomenon of SNUL, the blog-haters do have a point. I might, conceivably, have an interest in reading about the pet peeve with Jack in the Box heads…but overall — and I realize this is a crass generalization, loaded with problematic exceptions — SNUL is bereft of value or purpose, and is just plain tacky.

YogaThink of blogging as jogging. Yeah I’m a poet and I don’t know it…let’s say Eva Longoria is your next door neighbor, and of course she’s into physical fitness and so is jogging every single morning at six a.m. You like to get up at seven, but of course you’re going to adjust your morning routine. I mean, have you seen her on that show? Good Lord. And of course Eva knows you’re watching; there are very few people who are more appealing to the eye when exercising, than the lovely and talented Eva. So she conducts her little fashion show, and you continue to peek…all of which is somewhat tacky, but somewhat acceptable, what with it being a free country and all.

And then one afternoon Eva cruises by in her convertible with a bullhorn in hand and yells at you, “SORRY I HAVEN’T HAD TIME TO DO ANY JOGGING LATELY.” And the tacky-factor just freakin’ skyrockets. That’s how I see the “sorry no updates lately” thing.

Again, I have no criticism for the individuals. Some of them have managed to build up incredibly voluminous followings, and the argument could be plausibly made that in their place it would be tacky not to SNUL. I can see that. But the whole does more damage than the sum of its parts.

And so we don’t SNUL here. We loathe SNUL.

However — as House of Eratosthenes was relocated physically, as in street addresses, during the least convenient week-and-a-half imaginable, the off-line messages have been stacking up. People want to know where I’ve been. I can see I’ve drifted off into that territory, it could be said, where one may be accused more fairly of substandard manners by engaging lack of SNUL, than the SNUL itself. Perhaps it would have been considerate to have gone ahead and SNUL’d. Or it would’ve been just plain good manners. “The Blog That Nobody Reads” is, after all, just a figurative term, and I’ve been reminded fairly often that there are people who do read it. They were left out in the cold when I didn’t post something saying what I was doing.

Well, hey. Part of the reason it’s called The Blog That Nobody Reads, is it’s built for the consumption of people who are mature enough to cope with the world as it really is, not as they would like it to be. I think all the nobodies have figured this out over the years, and that’s one of the reasons why this pastime has resulted in some great friendships. But the flip-side of that, of course, is that my personal life is one of the things in this huge thing we call “the world,” and I may very well disappear again. That’s just life. But anyway, back to the subject at hand — heh. Sorry no updates lately. I’ve been moving my stuff.

And doing a fairly piss-poor job of packing dishes & nick-nacks in boxes ahead of the move, like I should’ve been doing.

Anyway, it’s a good move. The last one, three years ago, was for economy. This one was for comfort. Not that the old place was uncomfortable or anything, I’ve lived in much worse before. But by this time, I’m not too sorry to see it go; it was a good place to live at the time, value was alright, neighborhood was much better than it could’ve been. But over the last year or so, it’s started to go to the dogs. Literally. Dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs.

I don’t appreciate that one bit. I actually like dogs, but my feeling is they’re being mistreated if they lack purpose. People shouldn’t own them just because they like having a thinking, breathing being utterly dependent on them. That’s an ego trip, and it’s abusive. Once you reach the point where everyone has to have a dog as a matter of ritual, that’s unfair to the animal. I mean, think about horses in the same context and you might see what I mean. Horses require even more upkeep than dogs. What if everybody started going out and getting horses, just because they felt they had to have a horse.

While carrying my second load of boxes for yesterday out of my nearly-empty apartment, I had to stop, heavy box teetering precariously on my shoulders, and negotiate for right-of-way with a girl walking her dog. While carrying the third load, I had to stop and do the same thing with a professional dog-walker who was out walking three dogs. While carrying the fourth load, I had to stop and do the same thing yet again, with a middle-aged woman walking her dog. The issue, the theme of this post overall, is a whole being greater than the sum of its parts…and the place I just left, nice place to live as it is, I think is a great example now. They’re in a position to say — no more. All existing pets are grandfathered in; new applicants, with pets, need not apply. The saturation point has been met and surpassed.

And, of course, none of the dog-walkers I saw on my last day, looked the least bit ready to use a conveniently-located plastic poop-scoop dispenser, and that gets into yet another pet peeve of mine. But like Winnie The Pooh says, that is a story for another day.

Mike Adams on Che Guevara

Thursday, August 2nd, 2007

Mike Adams writes to his university Board of Trustees with a proposal for erecting a proper memorial to Che Guevara. All these little darlings running around with their “Che” tee shirts, he figures, would be well-served with an education about Che’s famous quotations, thoughts, deeds, alliances, etc.

I also want to make sure that a special room documents Che’s commitment to gay rights. It is important for people to know that when Madonna dresses up in a Che Guevara outfit she is supporting a man who helped criminalize gay sex and supported the incarceration of young men who exhibited mannerisms merely perceived to be gay.

Another room could be used to place some of his actual correspondence in glass cases. That way, people could learn that Guevara signed some of his early correspondence “Stalin II.”

Another room could display pictures of Che fighting in actual revolutionary warfare. This room would be nearly empty because there is little evidence that he ever fought in anything that could be characterized as a real battle. This is due to the fact that most of the people killed by Che were men and boys he shot at close range while they were bound and gagged.

I got a question that kind of touches on this. We’ve got some young men and women who don’t wear Che tee shirts, but instead, wear sand-cammies and serve in Afghanistan and Iraq. I am not one of them, and have not been one of them. But I’ve had some good things to say about them.

Some other folks their age — some among them wearing the Che tee shirts now & then — have a nasty name they like to call people like me because of this. “Chickenhawk.” Over the years, I’ve noticed it’s not necessary for me to support the war to be called a chickenhawk. Simply saying kind things about the people serving…will do nicely. I find that interesting. I admire their service, I have not served. Slam dunk, I’m a chickenhawk.

My question is this: We have quite a few young people who run around wearing these shirts, and doing other things to subtly promote communism. Or lesser strains of the anti-capitalist contagion, such as initiatives to increase the minimum wage, and tax increases on the wealthy. Shouldn’t we have a similar slur with which to tag them — if they have not worked?

Coy Mistress

Wednesday, August 1st, 2007

If I were tasked to make a time capsule the size of an Altoids breath strips tin, with only one tiny hunk of paper sealed inside that is to capture the spirit of 2007 for the benefit of those unsealing it in 50 or 100 years, I think this piece is a great candidate. It is as unremarkable as it is representative. Captures everything we’ve heard since the day after Saddam Hussein was captured.

I THOUGHT of Andrew Marvell and his four-century-old verse when I read that General David Petraeus had said: “I can think of few commanders in history who wouldn’t have wanted more troops, more time, or more unity among their partners. However, if I could only have one, at this point in Iraq it would be more time.”

But Petraeus’s “coy mistress,” the broken Iraqi state, is not about to give in. The stated goal of the Bush administration’s escalation of the Iraq war is to buy time so that the warring and hostile factions in Iraq can work out acceptable compromises and power sharing. But the Iraqi factions don’t want acceptable compromises and power sharing. They want power for themselves.
:
Yes, it might be possible to pacify Iraq with a million-man American army of occupation over a period of 10 to 20 years. But not even that is a given. The military reality, as Colin Powell warned, is that the United States doesn’t have a big enough Army to pacify even the city of Baghdad. One neighborhood can be brought to heel for a while, but as soon as the American troops move on security, falls to pieces again.

The political reality is that Americans are fed up with George W. Bush’s bold attempt to reorder the Middle East and impose democracy by military force. What has now been so thoroughly revealed as a recklessness born of ignorance and a stubborn unwillingness to know has brought only disaster that cannot be repaired by a few more months or years of undermanned surges.

The entire article reads like this. Winning a war is one thing, but we don’t “have a big enough Army to pacify even the city of Baghdad.” And “reality is that Americans are fed up with George W. Bush’s bold attempt to…impose democracy by military force.”

Toss in a quote from a seventeenth-century poet, and the concoction is ready. Yet another intellectual titan is waggling his finger at that swaggering southern simpleton George W. Bush…I guess for starting “his” war. But there’s plenty more concoction where that came from, so fire up the conveyor belt. This is just one ingot, representative of tons of hot melted liquid anger. And contemptuousness.

But he’s right, isn’t he? Isn’t he just, oh, so incredibly right?

Well he’s certainly given that impression. That is how he earns his paycheck…by “looking” right. And contemptuous people do that naturally, since the surest path to contempt is a sincere belief that you’ve thought things out and someone else hasn’t. But it’s widely understood this is a complex affair, and it’s a small component to a War on Terror that is an even more complex affair. So it seems wise to take a couple steps back and see how this “rightness” works on the broader equation.

Nutcases from the middle east are trying to kill us. What do we DO? Act…or not? And I have to ask this because if we’re to smack our foreheads and glean any cherished bits of wisdom from this holy epiphany from the Boston Globe and apply them to the situation at hand, why, every lesson I can think of falls into the “Not Act” column.

And this is the item our editorialist seems to have missed. If the issue is that “Americans are fed up,” well, I think it can reasonably be stated that Americans are fed up with doing nothing while nutcases from the middle east try to kill us. If someone wants to challenge that, fine, maybe we should go ahead and duke it out. We got an election coming up. If populism is to decide national security issues, maybe the election should be about that: Are we just tin cans, beer bottles and metal ducks? Or are we a thinking people who engage the enemy when there is one?

As popular and plentiful as this kind of editorial tone is at the moment, I expect it will come as quite a shock to people living in 2107. It will have been a fact recorded by history that President Clinton signed an act of Congress, incorporating regime change in Iraq into U.S. policy. And, it will have been a fact that President Bush acted on this, and assembled a coalition to enforce previous resolutions by the United Nations. Clinton and the U.N. said; Bush did. We can conveniently ignore half that sequence because it’s politically popular with the print media to make this look like “Bush’s war,” but future generations will have to explore the legal framework of what happened here just to begin inspecting the times in which we live. And by then, all who stand to benefit from the misrepresentation that George Bush just woke up one morning and decided to ravage and rape Baghdad, a Xanadu-like utopia in which birds sang and children flew kites yadda yadda yadda…will be dead. Or frozen. Such deceiptful opportunists will, by then, much more closely resemble the “coy mistress” in her ultimate fate: Her lifeless body crumbling away in a tomb somewhere, worms deflowering her of the very virginity she coyly shielded from her erudite suitor.

Meanwhile, scholars and schoolkids studying the invasion of Iraq, will study not just that, but what came before. Would that we were diligent enough to do the same in our own time — but we are blinded by the bright lights of political exigencies.

What do we DO? What is our DECISION? Not just with the current situation in Baghdad, but with the overall issue of global terrorism? Such petulant inquiries simply summarize the thinking state of a mature and responsible adult; with apologies to Donald Rumsfeld, we make our decisions with the situations we have. To simply ask the questions, all but silences impertinent editorial pieces just like this one, which by now surely number in the tens of thousands. And it also reminds us that this, after all, is not George Bush’s war. It belongs to all of us, and we are on defense not on offense.

If we can be made to forget that for fifteen more months, we’ll see a Democrat in the White House. If not, then we won’t.