House of Eratosthenes

Here I sit on the couch cross-legged, in my jeans barefoot and shirtless, with my big ol’ belly spilling all over the keyboard. Lovely Saturday, full of fresh air outside, and I’m not in it. Because it’s a bit too fresh. As in dripping wet.

This “stay in shape by riding my bike on the weekends” thing is abso-freakin’-lutely not working out. The chosen dieties. Murphy. Evil weather-gremlins.

Doubt me? Take a look at this:

Brings to mind the old saying: Just because you’re certifiably paranoid, doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you. “They” being the weather muses. I know I’m not that important in the cosmic scheme of things, but on the other hand I know what random chance looks like…I know what a conspiracy looks like. What’s above resembles much more the latter than the former.

Viking Princess Swimming laps in the pool for now. This is the 38th parallel, dammit — I can see real palm trees from right here — I shouldn’t have to wait until mid-March for the get-blood-pumping season to start. I already declared the season open a good month and a half ago.

So glad I’m a dude. We can look somewhat gelatinous and somewhat sexy, at the same time. Still and all, I gotta do something that doesn’t involve sitting. My ass can’t take it, just for one reason. The Freeberg ass draws mostly from Scandinavian genetic material, and it really shows. There’s nothing back there. There’s about as much cushioning in our rear ends as there is in the dietary staples that feed into it…and what fed into the asses of our ancestors…which is mostly white codfish.

There. Now you’re not going to watch viking movies quite the same way ever again, are you? It’s good you come by to get my perspective on these things.

Heh. I SO relate to most of this. That said, we shall be taking Happy Hour on the verandah today; it’s almost gonna hit 60. A sweatshirt will do nicely; we’ve been stuck indoors for too long of late.
- bpenni | 02/27/2010 @ 13:33
Morgan, get off your rear. I’m south of you and managed to get out twice today.

Stop making excuses and exercize before you turn into Morgan the Hutt!
- HoundOfDoom | 02/27/2010 @ 19:46
I’m confused. Is this a commentary on the hit-and-miss predictions of the Weather Channel? I recognize the graphic, as I stop by their site almost daily and punch in my ZIP code for a forecast. I notice that they revise it at least daily, usually predicting rain on days that later turn out to be dry…..very rarely the other way around.
- cylarz | 02/28/2010 @ 03:16
No, that wouldn’t make sense. Your graphic is for the first week in March, which hasn’t arrived yet. Even more confused now.
- cylarz | 02/28/2010 @ 03:17
As long as the roads are dry, the experience of bicycling when it’s 36 degrees isn’t too much different from bicycling at 96 degrees. It only has an effect on how much water I’ll be carrying with me…I just need to know if it’s raining or not.

And on that one question, I’ve found them to be reasonably reliable. My frustration is that Thursday and Friday look ideal, Monday looks okay, the weekend’s screwed up. As far as the weekend we’re in now, it’s pretty much the same story.
- mkfreeberg | 02/28/2010 @ 05:39
[…] season had an early start but stumbled out of the gate, and spent some time just not working out. Now that it’s June I decided to kick things into high gear and ride the two wheels all the […]
- House of Eratosthenes | 06/06/2010 @ 10:36

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Just Not Working OutSaturday, February 27th, 2010

Just Not Working Out
Saturday, February 27th, 2010