House of Eratosthenes

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies .

So, he said to his new wife, ‘Honey, I’ll be right back.’

‘Where are you going, honey bunch?’ asked the wife.

‘I’m going to the bar, pretty face. I’m going to have a beer.’

The wife said, ‘You want a beer, my love?’

She went and opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India ,etc.

The husband didn’t know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, ‘Yes, lolly pop…but at the bar…you know…they have frozen glasses…’

He didn’t get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying,

‘You want a frozen glass, puppy face?’

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, ‘Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d’oeuvres that are really delicious… I won’t be long, I’ll be right back. I promise. OK?’

You want hors d’oeuvres, poochi pooh?’ She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d’oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

‘But my sweet honey… At the bar… You know…there’s swearing, dirty words and all that…’

‘You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your fucking beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherfucking snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren’t fucking going anywhere! Got it, Asshole?’

So he stayed home…

…and, they lived happily ever after.

*lol*

So true, it’s scary.
- pdwalker | 12/30/2009 @ 00:11
Maybe I’m taking this joke too seriously and looking too deep, but I’d like to say something about this.

I’ve seen this before. I had this forwarded to me sometime via e-mail when I was in college, when I was receiving three or four mailings a day from various joke lists to which I subscribed.

I didn’t laugh or “lol” then, and I’m not doing so now either. It’s not funny, not even a little bit.

Why? Because it underscores the very reason so many young men today fear marriage and commitment; to them it means some kind of “ball n chain” tying them to home and wife; that they’ll never see again see their friends at the bar or anyplace else associated with good times and happy memories.

I suppose the wife gets *some* credit for having all that stuff handy in the fridge – the imported beers, the fancy snacks, the frozen beer mug. But you know, none of it matters. I don’t drink or hang out in bars, but people who do have told me that the social aspect of it – being with the guys – is more or less the point of it all.

A woman who’s secure in her marriage isn’t threatened by this, and she doesn’t try to stop her husband from doing fun things with his male friends. Obviously there are some rules in place – no hitting on bar women, no driving drunk, call if you’re going to be late, etc etc.

But you could easily rewrite the joke and have it be about some guy who spent a lot of time hunting, fishing or other guy-time activity before he got married, and whose wife now won’t let him go. Those are things I do enjoy, and I can tell you I’d think long and hard about marrying a woman who tried to put the kibosh on them or otherwise neuter me and force me to stay home with her all the time. I wouldn’t tell my wife or girlfriend that she couldn’t go see a movie with her girlfriends or visit them, so why would any gal worth her salt want to do that to me?
- cylarz | 12/31/2009 @ 02:39
cylarz,

yes. definitely. you are taking it too seriously.

good humour often has a grain of truth in it, but taken to exaggerated extremes to the point of ridiculousness. yet, there remains that grain of truth.

that is where the humour is.
- pdwalker | 01/01/2010 @ 09:12

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Recent

Items of Interest

Monthly Archives

What They Say

Links

How a Marriage WorksTuesday, December 29th, 2009

How a Marriage Works
Tuesday, December 29th, 2009