Throughout a great variety of misadventures, I have learned the assignment of fault is mankind’s rational thinking at its very lowest. If and when it lands on me, any attempts on my part to appeal for a change of mind, are going to represent the very summit of wasted energy. What’s at stake doesn’t matter. If it’s part of the assemblage of an “anti-Morgan” narrative that’s going to cost me a cool job if it isn’t thwarted; if it’s monumentally unfair, and if facts and logic are on my side; if they want to blame me for the Chicago fire or the sinking of the Titanic; might as well just grin, say thank you for the opportunity, you’re right sir, and be on my way. Time to go.
People who are so obsessed with whose fault it is, are the most intransigent. They’re the first to grab the boss’ ear, because in general that’s where their efforts have been going. And they don’t know anything. They don’t recognize “Wouldn’t-a happened if it weren’t for X doing whatever” is entirely subjective.
In the past few years, I notice my conflicts with very young adults have to do with what I learned since I was their age. This is a generalization, but people in their age group think the assignment of blame is objective. They think there can’t be more than one opinion about that, and if there is such a plurality, that’s bound to be cured by way of some “two go in one comes out” contest that will pare the number down to a proper one. And then everyone involved has to take that seriously.
And in their conflicts with me, it seems they’ve made a goal of paramount importance, out of reaching their coffins without ever having received any of this blame for anything. I’m not sure what happened to make it so. But this “Nothing can be my fault” thing seems to have swelled in importance to overwhelm and engulf all other considerations.
The girls are extremely pushy — even the sensible, conscientious ones — about this question of wearing short skirts to the Sacramento Rotunda at one o’clock in the morning. It’s not that they’re wanting anything bad to happen as a consequence, or are being cavalier about it. Quite to the contrary, their pushiness is about how it shouldn’t happen. It better not! “I should be able to do that.” It’s most disturbing. The conversation ultimately has to end with an implied reassurance that this particular lady, out of the thunderdome of theory and here on the plane of real lived experience, doesn’t seriously plan to do that, thank goodness. But all your warnings about “Honey, no” or “Even scary-looking guys who can defend themselves best be out of there before dark” fall on deaf ears.
They just don’t want anything bad happening, should it happen, to be their fault.
And everything is like that. Again, this is a generalization. There’s a Pareto Principle thing going on: Eighty percent of the consideration of “What might happen? And what can I do to prevent it?” is being exercised by twenty percent of the kids who are capable of exercising it. That’s a fancy way of saying, on average, the kids are mostly or entirely avoiding it. They’d rather just not do things.
They’re turned off to religion, particularly Christianity. What does Christianity say? That there’s already so much that’s your fault, it’s futile to make excuses for it; all you can do is seek redemption you don’t deserve.
I don’t need to go to church.
I don’t need to get a high paying job. That means responsibility. Responsibility opens up a possibility that some event of deficiency or neglect might end up being your fault.
Don’t need to get married or have kids. Being a parent means any one out of lots of things, can and will be your fault.
Don’t need credit cards. Don’t even need a driver’s license. Don’t need, don’t need, don’t need.
I’m not blaming the kids. They didn’t raise themselves. It’s us older people, preparing our eventual replacements, who I can see have committed a major architectural blunder in this society we’ve been molding, shaping, building and nudging through its various evolutionary changes. We’ve produced a society that meets up with every little challenge that emerges, large and small, through the diligence of some decision-making or actor who says, “Better make sure such-and-such happens, or else when the whole thing collapses, someone might think it’s my fault.”
And then we’ve produced a generation that seems to have made a paramount lifetime objective out of “It’s not my fault.” Not by way of making good decisions once they’re in the situation. But by way of entirely avoiding the situation.
We asked for this. At least, our cultural reformers did. Decades and decades and decades of, “We want to change our evolving society, so that such and such a thing is everywhere, free for the asking; or, this other thing over here, will disappear and never be heard from ever again.” And so, rather than arguing for their desired changes rationally, they said “Support our cause or else you’re a bigot.”
And it worked, because too many people said “Well, I certainly don’t want to be a bigot.” In hindsight, we can see even people who agreed with the desired reform, should have insisted on a rational discussion of the pros and cons rather than falling in line, adding their inertia to the growing and accelerating battering ram of reform. But they didn’t so insist. They added to the inertia, and after awhile that became the default modus operandi of getting anything done: Just accuse anyone standing in the way, of…stuff.
Now we have a generation of kids who don’t want to be accused of any stuff.
People my age, particularly the men, can’t talk to them. We grew up watching Captain Kirk respond to some crisis with “Contact Starfleet, and inform them that on my authority, we are crossing into the Neutral Zone.” Or, “Mister Sulu, if you don’t hear from us in ten minutes, proceed to the nearest starbase without us. There won’t be anybody left behind.” Lesson: Take the risks. Absorb the consequences. Get blamed. Those doing the blaming are probably idiots anyway.
And in real life, crossing into adulthood in the age of feminism, we found out this is exactly how it works. Everything is our fault anyway. Might as well make the best decision you can, regardless, with a wink, a nod and a grin. Yes, you’re right; I caused smallpox.
Frankly, I’m worried. We’ve been looking down on bureaucrats who are terrified of doing the right thing, because they might get blamed, and thus stand in the way of what has to be done. But at least our bureaucrats standing in the way of what has to be done, are open to the question of being blamed. At least, by being so clearly terrified of it, they’re demonstrating a capacity to be open to the consideration. They have the stones to, at least, get in the way.
The difference is, an acknowledgment that you are doing something — or, are not doing something. And that this is going to have a direct effect on the outcome.
The kids today who can’t even do that much, have toppled over the precipice into adulthood. In theory, they’re accepting responsibility for making sure things happen. In practice, they’re not. Avoiding it has become a whole way of life for them.
And more are coming.